Hello "readers", I "hope" you are ready for another dose of life altering wisdom and tactics for you to completely ignore. Ignoring wisdom and turning away offers of help is "great" way to self-improve, which means if you listened to me, you would be better off or improved. It is what you said you wanted. I have given you that thing and you have not taken advantage of it. My books remain unread and in many cases, unpurchased, my pod casts un-played, the metaphorical phone calls of my methods go straight to your soul's voice mail instead of directly into the very essence of your being, as they have been designed to do.
I have made you a website full of listacles and insipid pictures festooned with my wise words, I have started a Twitter account to inspire you every 5 minutes as you go about your day making mistake after mistake, but you do not engage with my Tweets. There is even a FREE email course for you, you told me you loved those, do you remember that?
You have failed me in every possible way, yet I remain in your life. Why?
I no longer know.
So enjoy ignoring this installment of my pod cast which contains the knowledge you need to stop being how you are, but you will never know that, because you don't listen:
Yes, I am being sarcastic, nice of you to notice. I put quotation marks ("") around the sarcastic words so you would recognize them without needing assistance from your attendant.Your mother's opinion of you is correct, which should be impossible. Opinions are not facts, they shouldn't be able to be correct or wrong, they should only exist. Yet, here were are.
The Rev. Dr. Hugo Holmesnow has traveled the planet in a quest to dilute the wisdom teachings of ancient cultures so they are safe enough for common men and women everywhere to purchase and misuse.
His mystic training began at the age of four when he was accidentally left behind in the jungle while on a family vacation. Through a series of unlikely events he was eventually adopted by the local natives and trained to be a tribal shaman. After many years, Dr. Holmesnow left the familiarity and safety of the jungle to search for his family.
When he did not find them he climbed a mountain and was nearly killed in the process. The local mystic monks from the ancient monastery found him and nursed him back to health. This near death experience led him to conclude that there was more to life than what he learned from his shaman jungle training. He then began to immerse himself in the ancient mystical practices of the mountain monks. After many years he mastered them and returned to civilization. Forever changed, eternally superior.
Several weeks later he was no longer Hugo Holmesnow, son of incompetent parents. He was and is now The Rev. Dr. Holmesnow, certified life coach and inventor of the “Better Than You Superior Life Coaching System”. This system provides proven methods and techniques that are part of an overall method which contains the strategies that you need to excel, advance, achieve, attain, reach and conquer your dreams, goals, fears, hopes and desires.
In addition to creating a system of self-improvement, Holmesnow is the author of “What is Wrong With You? An Introduction to What is Wrong With You” and “Conquer Your Dreams: Defeat Your Dreams and Accomplish Your Goals”. Both are available now at Amazon in paperback and e-book formats.